Can you pick up a Standard from a stand in one swift movement without breaking your stride? c.Richard Baker

Olympics visitors are going to descend on London soon.

Since I’ve just returned to the city after four years abroad, I’ve been studying its inhabitants and learning to imitate them.

These are my conclusions.

YOU’RE A LONDONER WHEN…

• You don’t break your stride to pick up an Evening Standard from a stand
• You can trot down a moving Tube escalator in high heels
• You own something high viz
• You think 11pm is late
• You don’t question why the bus, train or Tube you’re waiting for is late or cancelled…
• But you’ll sure as hell get narky if a bus passenger deigns to pay in cash or ask a question of the driver hence delaying you by one minute
•  You’ve always thought you should one day take the open top tourist bus… but never have
• You are profoundly disappointed when it’s 13 degrees and there’s no sunshine- though this is the yearly average state of play and you’re not living in Rio
• You’ve had too much to drink in a public place
• You are able to navigate the streets of Soho though they were seemingly mapped out by a confused medieval goat

For exhibits of the above and great London street photography, go to the free exhibition at King’s Cross Station until August 15: www.lfph.org/diary/contemporary-london-street-photography.